Friday, June 19, 2009

Hit me hard ... I will not fall...

Ok, a hard week is slowly coming to an end, and looking back on it I must say that it was one of those times when you just have to say, "c'est la vie". I started my fitness regime again, hoping that I can get rid of some of this everyday stress. It is becoming more and more difficult to keep my patience, and I have found myself trying to find solutions to problems that were not even caused by me. This week's dilemma began with a harder look into myself, trying to find the imperfections and smooth them out, even make them disappear if I could. As I started my power walking, I found myself contemplating the accusations which have been slung at me all week. Too nice, too helpful, too patient ...too me... apparently. As work starts to pick up, everyone seems to have an opinion about everything, and their opinions seem to be the right ones. As I walked, I suddenly realised that becoming me ... this too nice, too helpful, too patient person... was not at all easy. All the people around me are so difficult to live with, that I have to be the one with all the answers, all the positive energy, all the right things to say, and this has become a way of life. Irony, sarcasm and negative energy fill the air so much that sometimes I feel that every breath I take will suffocate me. Yesterday, though, for about three hours, I took a break from them all. It was so simple to just forget everyone and everything for a small time. It was such a good feeling, that I realised that even small escapes are worth the effort. I must admit that I have to thank two friends for just helping me forget everything for a little while. Just talking - about nothing and everything - cleared my mind enough to be able to return to work with a smile, although it did not last very long.

So today I start with a different thought. Yes, there are problems. Yes, negative thoughts are always around, but I just say Yes to life. It has become too short to waste. It is too good to miss. So I say yes to too nice, too helpful and too patient. I say yes to good people. I say yes to the world. My story will be one with a happy end. As for the rest of you - hit as hard as you can ...