Advice needed!!!

Ok, so today I'm taking a small break from the problems in my village, and looking into my own problems. That's where I need your help. If there were an ad which would cover this area it would probably say

" Self employed thirty-something mother of two needs ideas ."

Having scoured the Internet looking for opportunities for a second source of income, I am so not capable of finding a solution. So I thought that, maybe, you could pause for a moment, and try to help me out. Yes, today I need advice...financial, emotional...anything to help me get unstuck.

Let me give you some insight. If I were a TV serial I would probably be something between Lost, Desperate Housewives and Weeds. Why these three you ask. Well, Lost because, although I am not a disaster victim stuck on a mysterious island, my life matches the confusing, disturbing scenario that I am used to watching. Desperate Housewives because well, the glove fits ... a close knit society with all its pros and cons, women trying to keep the family unit together...(only we don't have such exciting daily events). Weeds, because as situations go, illegality may be the only answer. It's a case of survival.

Anyway. Life sucks at the moment. If there were a bottom this girl's barrel, then yes, I've touched upon it. Now the funny side is...that there is a funny side!!! I mean, I can laugh. Each conversation I have with any of the bank employees seems to be filled with hysterical quotes, such as "if you pay of all the loan today, you won't be blacklisted" to which I unassumingly reply "if I could pay it off, I wouldn't be talking to you now, would I!!". I have an endless list of these employees great quotes, which, one day, when I have less to worry about, I may take the time to make a post of, but not now. What I need now is your help...

Ideas, guys, ideas. I'm hard-working, but I'm just not getting there. Private teaching is great, if you get paid correctly, but my problem is just that. Imagine, yesterday October 8th, I got paid for a student who had lessons in July!! IOU has become a way of life, intead of an exception to the rule, and my good-nature has been played to death. So I need ideas. I need to find my destiny, which I am sure is not waiting for me to just fall upon it.

In this TV serial there are two scenarios:

1. Perfection... Having money in the bank, investing in my future and the future of my children, not owing anything, not being owed, taking weekend trips, finishing that book, feeling a sense of achievement.

2. Reality...Working 24/7, owing to all and sundry, not being able to give enough time or energy to my kids, fighting mental blocks trying to finish that book, feeling a sense of letting me and those I love down.

I need to scratch scenario 2, and I need your help and ideas... Whatever you can think of... (as long as its legal) . Now as for scenario 1, well ... that's where I need to be heading.